10)     Lower corner of screen has the words "Etch-a-sketch" on it.

   9)    It's celebrity spokesman is that "Hey Vern!" guy.

   8)    In order to start it you need some jumper cables and a
           friend's car.

   7)    It's slogan is "Pentium: redefining mathematics".

   6)    The "quick reference" manual is 120 pages long.

   5)    Whenever you turn it on, all the dogs in your neighbourhood
           start howling.

   4)    The screen often displays the message, "Ain't it break time
           yet?"

   3)    The manual contains only one sentence: "Good Luck!"

   2)    The only chip inside is a Dorito.

   1)    You've decided that your computer is an excellent addition to
           your fabulous paperweight collection.

• For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

• Every time the lines on the road were repainted you would have to buy a new car.

• Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.

• Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre, such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart; in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

• The airbag system would say "are you sure?" before going off.

• If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.

• Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive, but would only run on five percent of the roads.

• You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT". But, then you would have to buy more seats.

• Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their cars, which would make their cars run much slower.

• The oil, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

• New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

• Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lift the door handle, turn the key and grab hold of the radio antenna.

• General Motors would require all car buyers to purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a General Motors's subsidiary) even if they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more.

• General Motors would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.

• Every time General Motors introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

• You'd press the Start Button to shut off the engine.